The exciting options (and rising costs) of kids’ birthday parties

“I want PopularMMOs at my party.”

My son is planning his eleventh birthday — six months in advance. For the entertainment, he is requesting I fly the popular Minecraft YouTube star in from Florida and put him up in a hotel.

“And you should pay PopularMMOs something for his time,” my son reasons. “Maybe … $500?”

When did birthday parties become so over-the-top?

Parenting expert Alyson Schafer agrees children’s parties are becoming increasingly decadent. “I have heard of first birthday parties that cost thousands of dollars, organized by event planners,” she says.

From loot bag stores, to party palaces, and travelling princess parties, Schaffer says, “An entire industry has been built to market, create desire, entice consumerism around birthdays.”

A parent of two children, Yashy Murphy knows about elaborate first birthday parties. Murphy says it isn’t uncommon for first birthday parties to be a grand celebration in Sri Lankan culture. When her daughter turned one, 70 friends and relatives helped celebrate with a Bollywood-themed bash. “It was a special occasion, as it’s a culturally important milestone in the South Asian community,” she explains.

The price tag? $1,500, including rental space, food, drink, loot bags and decorations. But Murphy says she’s heard of other first birthday parties in her community costing far more.

Laura Cannone founded Glama Gal Tween Spa in 2006 with her sister, Josie. There are now six locations in the GTA. Accented in hot pink and zebra print, the spas cater birthday parties for young girls and teens.

While Cannone remembers some of her best birthday parties took place in the backyard with water balloons, she says society has changed. “Parents are busy and are looking to hire out to services like ours,” she says. Cannone knows what her customers need. “I’m a mom too; it has to be the easiest party ever,” she says.

It’s natural for parents to want to make our kids happy, especially at a time as important as their birthday. But, is it the kids running the show when it comes to lavish birthday celebrations, or the parents vying to keep up with one another? Schaffer thinks it’s a bit of both. “Kids put pressure on parents because they go to other friend’s birthday and want the same kind of fun,” she says.

Cannone says she’s had requests from parents for personalized embroidered bath robes as a loot bag gift ($50 a pop), had party guests turn up in a chauffeured limousine, or in matching outfits designed specifically for a birthday party. “Parents can let their heart overtake their rational thinking and family budget,” says Schaffer.

Instead of the parent being the killjoy when it comes to their child’s party, Schaffer suggests they discuss the problem and solve it together. “Our family budget for your birthday is X number of dollars. How would you like it spent?”

Deciding whether you’ll spend $25 on a store-bought cake, or buy a $5 mix gives your child some ownership over their special day. “This way, your child has a say in what is important to them, while you retain control over the dollars,” says Schafer.

Murphy also relied on family and friends to save money for her daughter’s big bash. “I baked the cake, easily saving $300 and borrowed saris from a friend to dress their venue.”

It turns out my son isn’t the first to want to pay for a special guest appearance. “We’ve had members of The Next Step signing photos at parties,” says Cannone. He’s also right on the money for what that could cost me. So for now, he’ll have to make do with seeing his Minecraft idol on his computer screen on his big day. I might even throw in a party hat.